Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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