Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
My boob is missing a layer of skin
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Randomize
