you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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