Don't make out with my wife yet
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
