"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Where did you get a picture of my penis
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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