She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I stole a fireplace last night.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
