Where is the hickey?
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
sex in a hospital.. check
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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