I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
its liver damage thursday
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