Don't you send me to vm
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I would fuck him just for his dog
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize