This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
My underwear smells like fireworks.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
