I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
