So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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