go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
