I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
