I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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