another moral hangover. fuck.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Dicks are not precious.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
