Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Randomize
