I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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