elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I have fence marks all over my body
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
