I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
