so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
