So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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