btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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