He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Reggie can tackle my bush.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
