Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize