I think scott just propositioned me for sex
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
