He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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