well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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