how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
operation harelip BJ is a go
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
