Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
