Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
