it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
