There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
