Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
We left the knife in your bed.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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