Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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