My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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