you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
