I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
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