Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize
