that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I supernannyed him into submission
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
