I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
