Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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