There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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