Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
