im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
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