We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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