I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
