Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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