More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
