i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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