How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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