I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
