I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
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